You order a burger so the fries have something to stand next to. A place earns your loyalty with its fries: the salt, the crunch, the shape, how they hold up on the drive home. You’ve ranked them, at least in your head, and you could defend every position.
You finish what you start. Every fry gets eaten, including the small crispy ones at the bottom of the bag, which you consider the best part. If someone at the table leaves a few behind, you notice. You offer to help, purely as a public service.
You’re easy to please and hard to fool. A great batch makes the whole order work, and a limp one takes a little shine off the evening, though you’re too polite to say so. Sauce is welcome, but fries this good don’t need much help.
Your copycat move: master fries at home. With the right potato, a soak, a double fry and the right seasoning, homemade fries can get remarkably close to the drive-thru. Nail one style, then move on to the next. The list is long, and you’re the right person for it.
